There is something so lovely, so musical about the word ambivalence. It conjures, for me, images of bodies moving fluidly through an aerial landscape, back and forth, swimming in air. But the word is often most often used as a pejorative, as if to feel intensely, oppositionally is somehow strange, possibly, in Freudian terms, sick.
The word derives from the Latin prefix and root: ambi (meaning both) and valentia (meaning strength). But unlike ambidexterity, which is thought to increase one’s strength and ability, ambivalence is more often said to wreck havoc on our lives. And it can be exhausting, holding the positive and negative emotions, balancing the weight of such divergent feelings. But ambivalence is also a highly generative place. It is not unlike the tension between temperatures and particles that birthed the universe.
Ambivalence is an important marker of change, or a place in one’s life where change is called for; it is the resonant blast of a horn.
Whenever you feel the pendulum of ambivalence, know you are in a place of incredible opportunity. What, you ask, is my life calling for now? Let the brilliant galaxy of this new possibility come forth.
I really like this post. You are right that ambivalence is a place of opportunity. It is hard to sort through sometimes, but can be ourselves calling for a new road.
ReplyDeleteThe blog is beautifully written and thoughtful - thanks for this!